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Minggu, 04 September 2011

Top 10 Rules for Boyfriends


No.10 NEVER CHEAT. This is self explanatory. And yes, cheating includes being "best friends" with a girl you've just met last week. At the same time, if you do stay faithful, DO NOT parade your fidelity like it's some rare feat of undying love. Please be advised that faithfulness in a relationship is a GIVEN and not an elusive trait that should be treated with utmost gratitude and reverence.

No.9 ALWAYS offer to take your girlfriend home no matter what. Even if it's high noon and the sun is at its brightest and the criminals of the country are probably still hibernating in their mission control centers, do accompany her home. She needs to know that you do this because you really are concerned about her safety and wants to spend every available time with her and not because you fear the wrath of her parents if she arrives home late without a chaperon. 

No.8 If you both don't have work or class and your girlfriend asks you to go out with her, do not make excuses that you're a) exhausted b) don't have money c) have a basketball game later and d) doing the laundry. Her invitation just means she's willing to sacrifice her free day to be with you in expense of being rested in preparation for another week of backbreaking work. Make time. Make every EFFORT to be with her.

No.7 If your girlfriend asks you to write her a love letter, write her a goddamn love letter. It doesn't matter if you're not the sentimental scrapbooking type of guy or have horrendous grammar, just do it. It doesn't have to be pretty nor poetic, it just has to be real and heartfelt. And even if you are illiterate, she will appreciate crudely drawn symbols on a tissue paper, trust me. All you need is a pen and paper, it's not that hard.


No.6 NEVER ask for stuff that can be bought with money during gift-giving seasons like Christmas or birthdays. This includes looking at expensive items at the department store and hinting that you are in desperate need of them. If ever she asks you what do you want for your birthday, the correct answer would be, "Your love is all I need," (or some sweet cliched derivative of that) and not, "A new cellphone."

No.5 Appreciate her interests, talents and accomplishments. If she writes an article that garnered good reviews and became semi-viral and you're allergic to reading, swallow up your manly pride and READ HER WORDS. If she likes hanging out in bookstores and you get hives when standing within 3 meters from a book shelf, have patience and understand her passions the same way she doesn't complain when you take her to numerous athletic stores she has no interest in while looking for some gadget she knows nothing about.


No.4 A) Do random romantic acts of affection. Once in a while, buy her a gift for no apparent reason. Post on her Facebook wall, text her cheesy quotes, show up in her workplace out of the blue and accompany her home. Tell her you love her everyday, not because of routine, but because you mean it. SHOW HER how much she means to you, not because she wants you to, but because you want to make her happy and her smile lights up your world.

B) If your girlfriend asks you to call or text her at least once a day, please take note that this number is the bare minimum. It doesn't mean that if you do meet the quota, everything is fine and that she's extremely happy that you've somehow managed to allocate 30 seconds of your precious time and spend P1 load in her honor.

No.3 NEVER let the woman pay for anything, even if she insists, even if her bank account is fatter than yours. If you go out on a date, make sure you pay for everything, including the transportation, movie and dinner. A woman looks for a good provider, and one of the worst things that could happen is you asking your girlfriend for the 16-peso Jeepney fare in front of numerous passengers. If money is a problem though, make sure you compensate by being the sweetest and most caring lover she has ever known. Money does make the world go round but love is still far more powerful than pieces of paper that could buy stuff.


No.2 Be the Prince Charming in every fairy tale that she has ever watched. Be the Noah Calhoun of her Allie, the Mr. Darcy of her Elizabeth Bennet., the Romeo of her Juliet. Love her the way Severus Snape loved Lily Potter. These may be fictional characters but women dream of their stories and wish they would happen in real life. Make her fantasies a reality and she will offer you everything that she's got.

and the No.1 Rule for Boyfriends is...

No.1 Realize all these before it's too late.


**Photos taken from Tumblr.

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